Campaign of the Month: May 2014
Ladies in Hades and the Dyval Wears Prada
so after 2 weeks of riding with the caravan im exhausted! ive spent almost non stop time cureing everyone i can of the plague. most of these people seem to think im a gift from god or something. one of the traveling merchants started writing a letter of sorts. he called it the book of james and that he would make sure it is included in the bible. he also kept calling me the brother of jesus. i have no idea what he was on about. i think he might be simple. what ever..im not too concerned with that as we have finally reached [name of town is smudged and unreadable]. its much larger then i expected! Trent and I went to the temple of thor to speak to the head priest there while zander and HDSS went off to find the boxes of incense.
Upon entering the hall of Thor we where surprised. it was like a bar room romp! beer, tits and fighintg…was almost like being back at the Valhalla! we mangaged to track down the head priest of the “temple” he greeted us and told us he just kinda burns the shit at a minimal but really doesnt give a rats ass. we trioed to ask him for more info but he didnt seem to want to speak. i figured if we wanted any more info we would have to speak his language so i challenge him to a fight. its hard to remember that im a god now. and that these mortals are so fragil. ill give the man some credit he managed to tackle me. but i always win. you could hear a pin drop in that room when i lifted this 400lb bag of flesh over my head like he was paper. from that point on the “priest” called me an avatar of thor. sigh….i cant win.
anyways HDSS and zander showed up. turns out all the incense was in the basement. we teleported 2 of the 3 boxes into the ocean…we dont know where the third ended up. we then went to the catholic church. turns out thier head priest was too busy in the “temple” of thor gettin g wasted! i let trent handle this one and kinda just stood back. so..job one complete. we got both parties to stop burning this stuff, we also learned the next shipment was a week away. so we got bored and decided to go follow up on what Hel told us.
we reached King Hrothgar place it seems he had just gotten married. we noticed 2 things right off. first the queen was hot as hell..but also seemed kind of in a daze. 2nd we noticed a large arrow hanging on the wall. the king was nice to us. he fed us and such. we where marry. we didnt think much of the queen at this point. it was the arrow i was more concerned with…since i was carrying its exact double in my bag with me. i pulled it out and they did match. i learned that it came from england and was from a man calling himself robin hood. i have my theroies here. either at this point in time Orion is pretending to be robin hood or its Orion is supplying robin hood with these arrows. but if the later is true how in the hell is he shooting them from england to norway? ill have to find out later on.
We retired early. when we woke up we started hearing rumors that something had happened at the kings place. we went over there to see what., when we got thier it was choas! dead bodies every where. the king was upset and said he would reward us if we killed the creature who did this. trent did his time thing with the viuewing and such. me and HDSS where actully in agreement that this was a travisty and the guilty had to be punished. first thing we have actully agreed on i think. we marched for maybe 2 hours and arrived at the entrance to a cave. what we found inside was crazy to say the least…a monster, his mother and the end of the world all in one place….